I was kneeling.
Offering something up.
What that was, I’m not quite sure.
Uncertainty, perhaps. Doubt, always.
And this thought came to me.
A thought that took root in my soul.
I nearly laughed, right there in my pew.
After everything that’s happened? After everything that didn’t happen? After it all, you’re asking this?
You want me to trust?
I thought it was all gone, my trust. I thought it had slipped through my fingers and drifted away in the wind. With enough time and broken promises and wayward paths, I thought I’d lost every bit of it along the way.
But one tiny fleck remains and He pointed to it and said, “Yes, that little part. Hold onto it.”
So here I am.
Despite it all, despite my own wondering and wandering and wounded heart, I’m trusting.
Trusting Him. Trusting others.
It’s a resolution I didn’t make.
A resolution I surely didn’t want.
But it’s here now.
So all year, I’m trusting.